PARADISA LOST

[Dictated in a rather ominous tone at first]

There was once a giant turd in which many people lived. Their hands and feet were bound to girly teenage blogs so they could only write about asinine occurrences, and there were tacky curtains adorning their rooms. One day ... someone managed to break free from the teenage blogging.

And then found out ... there was still nothing to do.

Because this place ... sucked.

Sucks... this place sucks. Boringboring...boring. So boring. Ohgod...soboring. How did it come to be? Such a boring place? It is dreadful and horrid and putrid and it smells out here, and everyone keeps taking bathroom breaks, and no one told me if I should bring bug spray, and I do not like the eerie feeling I am getting.

Perhaps it is because the Castle knows I have found out its secret.

[OPEN OR THROUGH JOURNAL; zachary is on the trip |D not that anyone wants him to be there]

[DICTATED.]

[His voice sounds quite ... less than pleased. EASIEST WAY TO PUT THAT. In fact, this young man is throwing a hissy fit, huffing and puffing in annoyance.]


Bunny? Bunny!? Good Lord, woman! Have you honestly ended up fiddling with --

... Bunny? Where did you ...

[He sighs, then in an almost hopeful tone...]

Raven ...? Eddie? This definitely doesn't look like the work of Neron, but.

How could I just get teleported to -- just my luck. I'm probably in some alternate reality or something, and who else would be responsible other than that foolish league of Titans? Well, you all have me where you want me! What do you neeeeeeeeeeee-oh.

A book.

[He flips through the pages.]

It's of magic descent, and yet ... I see no writing of pertinence in here. Just a bunch of whining and chit-chat. Did I stumble upon some interdimensional teenage diary, or something?

REAPPA PAM!!!

[And with a POOF, a map appears in Zachary's hands.]

Much better. Now, talking book. Impress me.