paradisalost | ╬ eleventh bite; the same deep water as you

[ It's been over a week since he's had a drop of blood. He had invited Jack to breakfast, to change how it looked. But, he couldn't change the fact that he was using Jack. But, Jack was fine with it. It had been his idea in the first place. This way, he avoided attacking people like Lana. He wonders if in fact drinking human blood is changing him, if what he did to Wes not bothering him is something to worry about. He'd been wondering how he could keep this under wraps from Elena. Damon was all ready suspicious. He knew. Stefan wasn't saved. Or better. He was drowning. It was apparent in his run-around conversation with Booth, in his conversation with Fred. Even Ianto.

A few days ago he'd started feeling it, the urge, the need. But, he'd ignored it. He couldn't trust himself in the clinic. He'd take too much. He'd run out of his trunk of blood a few weeks back.

Quickly, he writes a message to Jack. ]

( Jack Harkness )

Can you get away?

[ Waiting, Stefan tries his best at patience. Out of frustration, he swings his arm, knocking his journal to the ground - open.

At the knock, Stefan wastes vampire speed to open the door. He might look like any old addict if it wasn't for hints of black in his eyes. ]

Come in.

Such a gentleman.

[Jack chuckles, his distinct voice hard to mistake even if it's a little distant as he steps inside.]

I'm trying to be better.

[ Stefan closes the door and still doesn't notice the open journal. ]

To need it less. To curb the cravings.

[ He takes Jack's jacket. By now, they have a routine down. ]

I talked to Ianto.

Really? [Jack flops down on the couch, propping his feet on the coffee table. After a while, he figured that he could at least make himself comfortable given the service he was providing Stefan.] Did you tell him anything?

I couldn't. It's not mine to tell.

[ He peels himself away from the doorway and goes to sit beside Jack. ]

I can't judge you for not telling him. It's not like I'm...not doing the exact same thing.

[ He looks at Jack. ]

Elena and I are back together.

[Jack sighs, running a hand through his hair]

I should tell him. I just don't want him to worry over nothing. If she's as special as she sounds, don't let something like this ruin things.

[Jack knows from experience that nothing is worth the loss of someone that accepts you for better or worse.]

Easier said than done. So much is easier said than done.

[ Stefan grips the back of the couch, trying to deny that he needs a fix. ]

I need it, Jack. I want to ... not have to need it. For weeks I haven't been able to come to terms with the castle doing this to me. At least with another loss, a memory loss -- maybe Elena could be safe and away from the danger that Damon and I pose for her.

[ He gulps down air. ]

I used to just put Damon in that category. But, we're fast becoming the least popular people around here. Remember our conversation about ... doing something you know is wrong? I feel like I've gone so far past the point of no return.

[Jack just listens, not really knowing exactly what to say. He's hardly in a position to lecture about what's wrong or right, especially when it had to do with someone's survival. But that was why he was doing this. As long as Stefan fed off him, an immortal man, maybe it could keep others from getting hurt.]

Whadda ya say we get this over with and we can talk when you're not jonesing for a fix?

[ He only laughs bitterly because of how Jack words it. But, he's hungry and clearly terrible at hiding it. So, his eyes go black, veins and all as he leans down and bites Jack's neck. From the door, this looks very intimate.

His journal sits on the ground, still open, recording it all. ]

[ OOC: And thus ends a joint post between Jack and Stefan. Jack's dialogue is bolded. This was broadcast to everyone. It takes place tonight. And replies can come from both of them. Only the first line is written and filtered. Everything else is broadcast. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

We will. We...actually were friends before all this. We haven't talked since...not that I'm expecting to.

I won't. I really...won't. I'm ... an addict.

[ When Elena gets there, Stefan is laying in bed, facing the back wall. ]

Just be careful, okay?

Being an addict isn't permanent, Stefan.

[ And zoom, she is at your room. She opens the door and closes it, leaning back against it. ] Stefan? [ And she closes her journal and places it on a table. She walks over to his bed and sits on the edge, looking very concerned at him ]

[ He rolls onto his back, reaching for her hand. ]

[ She grips it tightly, intertwining their fingers. ] Where's your journal?

[ On the ground. Open. ] By the desk. [ He squeezes her hand. ]

[ With a squeeze, she gets up and walks to the desk, slamming it shut. She grabs her own and places them on the ground. She gives him a small smile as she returns to the bed, sitting on the edge again and taking his hand. ] Better safe than sorry, right?

Are you okay? [ From the broadcast. From everything. From your fix. ]

I'm okay. [ He tugs lightly. ] Come here.

Seriously? Did - I'm sure I wasn't the only person to overhear that. [ But she moves at his tug, coming to sit right beside him. ]

Damon, Caroline, Alaric, Piper, Percy, Fred and Wes - they all heard it. Lilah, too. And that means everyone did. Lexi is probably trying to decide what to say or how to say it. Right now, I'm the rabid dog they don't want to come too close to.

Lie with me?

You're not a rabid dog, Stefan.

[ Elena pretends to think about it, smiling all the while, and lowers herself beside him. She turns to look at him, still wearing her mask of concern. ] I'm sure you may have made a few friends there. Something good has to come out of this.

Is Caroline taking this well? I know you two are close.

There are friends I've made. A sixteen year old I had to explain addiction to. Piper, who, all things considered has taken this very well. But there are others. Burgeoning friendships. An indestructible girl who's heart was hardening...I was getting through to her. Now she thinks I'm a monster.

She hates that I lied to her. She's angry.

Is she from a world where vampires exist? The ... indestructible one. [ Elena files that away for her to question later. ] Does she know you well enough to be angry? I know you Stefan, and you're not a monster. And anyone who knows you would never think it.

[ ... ] I hope you told the sixteen year old that drugs were bad. [ She grins ]

I don't know. I don't think so. She doesn't know me that well. We went to the shooting range once. We've had two conversations. She doesn't know me well enough to know me.

D.A.R.E would be proud.

If you want her as a part of your life here, maybe you should give her space and then approach her? She knew you as Stefan, not Stefan the Vampire. That's got to mean something. And if not, maybe I could talk to her. As a last resort type of thing.

[ She laughs ]

The only person I want and need as a part of my life here is you. But, I'm worried about her. Her name's Claire and the man she loved -- the guy -- he was taken away from her, he went home. She has so much pain.

You can't fix it, Stefan. As much as anyone would want to, the only person who can give him back to her is the castle. [ :( ] Is she ... going to do something reckless because of it?

╬ eleventh bite; the same deep water as you

( elena salvatore ) lmao i did didn't i

( stefan gilbert ) an unhackable filter has been created ;;

( elena salvatore ) lmao love you bb

♥

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