╬ eleventh bite; the same deep water as you

[historyrepeater.livejournal.com]

[ It's been over a week since he's had a drop of blood. He had invited Jack to breakfast, to change how it looked. But, he couldn't change the fact that he was using Jack. But, Jack was fine with it. It had been his idea in the first place. This way, he avoided attacking people like Lana. He wonders if in fact drinking human blood is changing him, if what he did to Wes not bothering him is something to worry about. He'd been wondering how he could keep this under wraps from Elena. Damon was all ready suspicious. He knew. Stefan wasn't saved. Or better. He was drowning. It was apparent in his run-around conversation with Booth, in his conversation with Fred. Even Ianto.

A few days ago he'd started feeling it, the urge, the need. But, he'd ignored it. He couldn't trust himself in the clinic. He'd take too much. He'd run out of his trunk of blood a few weeks back.

Quickly, he writes a message to Jack. ]

( Jack Harkness )

Can you get away?

[ Waiting, Stefan tries his best at patience. Out of frustration, he swings his arm, knocking his journal to the ground - open.

At the knock, Stefan wastes vampire speed to open the door. He might look like any old addict if it wasn't for hints of black in his eyes. ]

Come in.

Such a gentleman.

[Jack chuckles, his distinct voice hard to mistake even if it's a little distant as he steps inside.]

I'm trying to be better.

[ Stefan closes the door and still doesn't notice the open journal. ]

To need it less. To curb the cravings.


[ He takes Jack's jacket. By now, they have a routine down. ]

I talked to Ianto.

Really? [Jack flops down on the couch, propping his feet on the coffee table. After a while, he figured that he could at least make himself comfortable given the service he was providing Stefan.] Did you tell him anything?

I couldn't. It's not mine to tell.

[ He peels himself away from the doorway and goes to sit beside Jack. ]

I can't judge you for not telling him. It's not like I'm...not doing the exact same thing.

[ He looks at Jack. ]

Elena and I are back together.

[Jack sighs, running a hand through his hair]

I should tell him. I just don't want him to worry over nothing. If she's as special as she sounds, don't let something like this ruin things.

[Jack knows from experience that nothing is worth the loss of someone that accepts you for better or worse.]

Easier said than done. So much is easier said than done.

[ Stefan grips the back of the couch, trying to deny that he needs a fix. ]

I need it, Jack. I want to ... not have to need it. For weeks I haven't been able to come to terms with the castle doing this to me. At least with another loss, a memory loss -- maybe Elena could be safe and away from the danger that Damon and I pose for her.

[ He gulps down air. ]

I used to just put Damon in that category. But, we're fast becoming the least popular people around here. Remember our conversation about ... doing something you know is wrong? I feel like I've gone so far past the point of no return.

[Jack just listens, not really knowing exactly what to say. He's hardly in a position to lecture about what's wrong or right, especially when it had to do with someone's survival. But that was why he was doing this. As long as Stefan fed off him, an immortal man, maybe it could keep others from getting hurt.]

Whadda ya say we get this over with and we can talk when you're not jonesing for a fix?

[ He only laughs bitterly because of how Jack words it. But, he's hungry and clearly terrible at hiding it. So, his eyes go black, veins and all as he leans down and bites Jack's neck. From the door, this looks very intimate.

His journal sits on the ground, still open, recording it all. ]


[ OOC: And thus ends a joint post between Jack and Stefan. Jack's dialogue is bolded. This was broadcast to everyone. It takes place tonight. And replies can come from both of them. Only the first line is written and filtered. Everything else is broadcast. ]

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

So you just offered yourself up like some all-you-can-eat lunch buffet to somebody you don't even know the full details about.

[She misses the roof, the easy companionship]

[perpetualized]

[Jack sits back at that, because he knows how stupid it sounds. But he needed a purpose, as selfish as that sounded.]

Why does it matter to you?

[He doesn't say it in a rude or accusing tone, rather one of genuine curiosity. In his long life, he hasn't met many people that would react the was Fred was.]

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

It matters because it matters.

[Why were people having such a hard time seeing that?]

And he compelled someone I care about to forget, he altered their memories. If he did that to someone you were close to, wouldn't it matter? And it's all the same thing. Excuses, avoiding...sooner or later he's going to have to face this. And you're going to have to face whatever made you offer yourself up to him. Because it's not right. It just isn't. And I think you both know it.

[perpetualized]

I did this because I didn't want him going after the people I'm close to, but no one seems to understand that.

He didn't compel me. He tried at first, but it didn't work. I fought it. So we talked, and I offered. I'm doing it to keep my friends from having to worry about running into him in a dark alley, to keep him from compelling people that aren't as strong as me. With me, it doesn't matter if he goes too far and kills me, because I'll come back.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

And what happens when you're not enough?

[It's not anger that threads through her words, but exhaustion]

What happens to your friends then?

[perpetualized]

[Jack chuckles, a bit humorlessly] I'm always enough, Fred. I'm the gift that keeps on giving.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

[There's a hiss of breath, more irritated than not. But concern gently threads through it as well]

Maybe so, but that doesn't mean at some point or other he won't be bored by that. And then what?

[perpetualized]

[A sigh, though it sounds as if Jack were smiling] You don't have to worry about it anymore. I doubt Stefan's brother would let it continue even if we hadn't already talked about breaking things off.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

[There's a hiss of breath. She's still less than amused]

You realize you're making it sound like a relationship, right?

[perpetualized]

[Nothing Jack's not used to. Pissed off is a default mood for some of his friends. He just has that effect on some people.]

Kinda, huh? But hey, he's a cute guy, so don't think I haven't tried. I don't think I'm his type, though.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

[Well she's definitely earning her stripes, then]

Is everything always a joke with you? I should probably find that out now, just as a point of reference.

[perpetualized]

[Sighs] No, though I admit it's not the healthiest coping mechanism.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

So you are, right now? Trying to cope?

[She needs to know if all this even registers with him]

[perpetualized]

Dealing with everyone I considered a friend being mad as balls with me? Yeah, you could say I'm coping.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

[A pause]


You know...what does that even mean? I mean really, what does that have to do with anything?

[perpetualized]

[Sighs] Maybe we should drop it then

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

[There's a pause]

...I know we're still getting to know each other. So I should probably let you know I'm not the sort.

[perpetualized]

[Chuckles] I always manage to attract stubborn women somehow.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_fredless/]

I'm hoping I am supposed to take that as a compliment.

[perpetualized]

It was meant to be, yeah.