5th Lawsuit - Hitting it Big

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

I love this place. It's like my last vacation, but real and not just a screen saver on my computer. And best of all...I finally did it.

I bought myself a bed. For me! My bed! My own bed bought with my own money! Finally, I can sleep in something I bought without sharing it with my mother.

And people said I would never make it. That I would always be a pathetic sad sack that will fail at everything he tries to do. That no one would ever love such a waste of life like me. Well I showed them. I showed them all. Look out, world! Ted's finally hit the big time now!

Comments

[impulsities.livejournal.com]

You went on vacation in your screen saver, zoooom?

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

Not quite. My vacation was staring at my screen saver and wishing it was real.

[impulsities.livejournal.com]

Ohhh. zoom. Well congratulations on your awesome vacation, zooom!

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

Thanks. Yup, nothing could ruin it. Not a thing.

Uh...why do you keep saying zoom?

[impulsities.livejournal.com]

Did you shake the trees for money, zoooom? That'd make it even better!

I dunno, zoooom. I just do!

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

I didn't think about that. The trees have money in them? This gets better and better!

If it is possibly the result of a medical error, you could make a lot of money through a lawsuit.

[impulsities.livejournal.com]

I heard they do, zooom!

[pause cause he's actually thinking about it] Well, I have been getting hit a lot lately, zoooom.

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

Oh lucky day! [Sounds of someone searching for an umbrella or something]

You could attribute the inexplicable use of the word "zoom" to brain damage sustained from the repeated blows you have received. With a good lawyer, you could make a killing.

[impulsities.livejournal.com]

See, it's great here, zooom!

I don't think my brain is damaged, zoom. I feel fine!

[oirokenojutsu.livejournal.com]

Congratulations?!

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

Today is the greatest day of my life!

[oirokenojutsu.livejournal.com]

Maybe things will get better for you from now on!

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

...Is that even possible?

[oirokenojutsu.livejournal.com]

Of course it is! You make your own destiny.

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

Then...then...

I could have hair. Not a toupee, but real hair. Right?

[oirokenojutsu.livejournal.com]

Um... SURE! There must be something that grows hair out there!

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

I can see it now. I'll finally have hair again. Without my mother dying because of it! This place is awesome.

[dameluckypants.livejournal.com]

[Dictated forever] You sound like you're in a good mood.

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

[Dictated forever!] Oh, I am. I'm finally getting somewhere in life. I'm a go-getter now.

[dameluckypants.livejournal.com]

A go-getter is always a good thing to be!

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

And that's what I am. No longer am I Ted, the Hospital Sad-Sack! Now I'm Ted, the Castle Go-Getter!

[dameluckypants.livejournal.com]

Good for you! It's like you're a whole new person.

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

Because I'm in a whole new place. One that doesn't have my mom, or Kelso, or all the people I've ever loved.

[dameluckypants.livejournal.com]

Funny, you'd think that'd be a bit depressing. Depends on your relationships with them, I guess.

[notasadsack.livejournal.com]

Key words: "I've ever loved."

Plus, people talk to me here. And they know my name. And have tea with me. I have friends!