Four Hooves

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

Why? Why me? Why did I shut that door?! I- I can't get it open! I can't get my own door open! I missed my own party! It doesn't get much worse than that! It doesn't... I can't... I can't GO ON.

I'm going to starve in here. I'm going to STARVE. The Emperor. Starving. ALONE. Just an itty bitty twiggy llama thing! All by myself! With the door locked and the- do you have any idea how high up this floor is?! I can't even get the windows open! With these- with the... I'm getting a... a hoof cramp just from writing this!

Why meee? Why won't the guards come?! They-... they don't love me anymore! The evil, fire peasants turned me into a llama and now I'm stuck forever!

Comments

[townpunk.livejournal.com]

Okay, seriously? I can hear your whining through the walls.

It's not THAT bad.

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

IT IS THAT BAD. I'm stuck in here! No thumbs! Do you know what it's like to have NO THUMBS? And no food? And no servants? I'm all alone forever and ever in this stupid room!

[townpunk.livejournal.com]

Maybe the ghosts'll bring you something to eat if you ask nicely.

[lost-science.livejournal.com]

..... if you are really without a way to get food, the ghosts will eventually bring you some. It happened to me.


[A pause. Pen taps.]

Yes. We all conspired to turn you into a llama.

It's all part of our diabolical plan to make you miserable for no reason, despite the fact that you are still a total stranger to most of us, because we are cruel and spiteful like that.

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

GHOSTS?! Wha-... what?! Are we... are we dead here?! Did I die?! When did that happen?! I was supposed to rule my kingdom and now I'm a dead llama! A dead STARVING llama! Woe is me!


... SEE.

YOU ADMITTED IT. You're all evil! Evil, cruel, spiteful, icky peasants!

[lost-science.livejournal.com]

... they are not ghosts, exactly. They are spirits of some sort. They work in the kitchens an in various places across the castle and grounds. In the kitchen, they will make you any meal you request. They will bring you food eventually. You are not dead.


.. yes. That's right. I'm admitting it.

I turned you into a llama.

Despite living several floors below you and never having actually seen you. It was all me.

[maskedtraitor.livejournal.com]

Better llama than steak.

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

... You wouldn't!

[maskedtraitor.livejournal.com]

Considering that I have no idea where your location is, I can't.

But when I do, I can.

[azarath.livejournal.com]

Quit whining.

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

I'm not WHINING. I'm ... mourning! Myself! Yeah, uhuh.

[azarath.livejournal.com]

No one died; therefore, you can't mourn.

[to-dark.livejournal.com]

That's usually my line but either way, YES. PLEASE. NO WHINING

[remarkableoaf.livejournal.com]

A llama? Like a koala llama?

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

Like a LLAMA llama! Fur and hooves and non-Emperor-y smell!

[benevolently.livejournal.com]

What "evil, fire peasants" are you talking about?

... Is this Kuzco?

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

There were these meanie peasants that were all talking about fire and stuff. And one of them like burnt my journal! They're cooking llamas around here! I'm-...

... Yeaaah, that's my name.

[bunny-issues.livejournal.com]

You're a llama? Oooh, I can be a bunny~! Can I come visit you? {smiley face}

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

I'm a stinky llama... Uh. Okay. Yeah. Sure. You're a bunny?! Did Ima Nidjut turn you into one?!

[flameinexile.livejournal.com]

Hmph, serves you right.

I wish I could take credit for that.

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

YEAH, well, you're off the hook for now! Ima and Bart turned themselves in!

[noonetops.livejournal.com]

That's ridiculous. I didn't turn you into a llama.

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

Yeah. Turns out some guy named Ima did.

So... y'know... sorry for that, I guess. You're not the llama-turning peasant I thought you were. MAYBE YOU LOCKED THE DOOR, THOUGH.

[r4d1c41edward.livejournal.com]

...Llama!

Ed's read about those! They seemed SOOOO COOL. How did llama man become a llama?

[emperorkuzco.livejournal.com]

... SOME GUY NAMED IMA TURNED ME INTO ONE. He's big on that sort of thing.

And they're kinda WAY too STINKY to be cool.