paradisalost | (no subject)

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patrick murphy

(no subject)

[Recorded;]

[Sound of a door being kicked repeatedly]

OPEN TH' HELL UP!

[[ooc; This is after the whole raid-the-bar thing~]]

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[sound of said door being slammed open after a few minutes, and Even looms out practically huffing and puffing. Bloody apron and gloves ahoy.]

What in the hells do you want?

[Pause for staring at the apron]

...Huh? Oh. Just makin' sure yeh aren't dead or anythin'.

[And he's trying to squeeze past Even into the room now, whut]

Unfortunate that you haven't jumped the gun before me then.

[So totally trying to keep Murphy out.]

Yeah, a real pity.

[So totally ducking under/past him!]

...Does yer room always smell this nasty?

Didn't you say the same thing last time?

[A pause as decides if he was more concerned about his door being open or Murphy invading his room. Apparently he decides on the door, and closes it and locks it up again]

I was in the middle of something.

What, were ya in the middle of wankin' or something?

[Another pause/stare at the apron]

Or ya just goin' for th' Jack the Ripper look?

...Jack the Ripper? Who's that? I don't know anyone by the name of-

[a long pause]

Define the term 'wanking'.

[Massive fucking pause, where he's totally staring at Even like he's a retard]

Wankin'. Y'know..? Jerkin' off..?

[a very long, awkward pause]

...Jerking...? Wh- ...Oh.

[another very long pause]

You're a homosexual pervert.

[More staring]

Oh, not that bullshit again. Stuff a sock in it, will ya?

[Sound of Murph shuffling around, finding himself a seat away from any gore. Probably on the end of the bed or something.]

What'cha workin' on?

That's none of your business. Not like your lesser mind could even understand it anyway.

[Which Even promptly stalks over and is now trying to shove Murphy off the bed. Lol, getting blood on him.]

That's my bed and you're pissed. I'm not cleaning after you if you start puking! I'll make you get on your hands and knees and scrub.

Gee, tha- Hey! Get off'a me, twat!

[Flailing about, liberal use of swear words, then a pause, and he's totally licking the nearest accessible smear of blood]

[a sound of surprise, and then he stiffens]

Ghn-! Hnn.

[He makes a tsk noise, and then the sound of the bed creaking]

Do you always molest people when you're drunk and hungry?

[Scowly face]

That wasn't molestation. Quit bein' a fuckin' Drama Queen.

[Disgusted sound, then he wipes his tongue off on the back of his sleeve]

...That tasted fuckin' nasty.

You tongue was on my body. That's not a normal sort of interaction.

[he rolls his eyes and then scowls back]

Of course it tasted nasty. It's not fresh and it was on my arm. I imagine that's like eating an old sandwich out of a rubbish bin.

Yer covered in gore. Is that normal?

[Grumbled] Ugh. Worse than the refrigerated shit. [Cue grossed-out face]

Perfectly normal for me, I assure you.

[another eye rolling at the grossed out face]

Again, of course it was. Refrigerated blood is more fresh than what's on me.

Then yer damn weird.

[Pause where he's staring at a smear on his own hand]

...Got any paper towels?

I'm a scientist.

[a soft sound of irritation then the sound of boot steps as he goes to get paper towels. He returns, then leans over to clean the blood off Murphy]

You could have just gotten up and used the sink, you lazy arseface.

[Distractedly]

Hnh? Oh... Yeah...

[Longish pause, in which Murphy is fidgeting ~~like a crack addict~~, then a sudden creak of bed-springs as he's totallyjusttackledEvenomg TEETH IN NECK]

Wha- Aahhgnnn...

[a couple loud struggle-thumps, before it goes quiet. Yeah, Even's not a very strong dude, especially when he has teeth in his neck, and he totally just slumped into Murphy.]

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