Entry 0011.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

[dictated -- smaller, softer voice]

I cannot buy the kitten from the store and name it after its color.

I cannot see Kohaku's pink item.

I cannot go to the party.

[ooc: Nataku's just going to be using this icon. I'm sorry! And, it'll probably eventually be talked out of being utterly depressed! And then a wondrous log between Kohaku and Nataku about getting kittens! PROMISE! XD]

Comments

[twoto-two.livejournal.com]

Why not?

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Because I cannot find Father so that I can honor him.

[twoto-two.livejournal.com]

Why does this mean you can not buy a kitten or go to a party?

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

I don't know.

I don't think I should be allowed to go.

[twoto-two.livejournal.com]

We think you should be allowed to go.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Why?

[twoto-two.livejournal.com]

Because your presence would, doubtlessly, make some residents happy, which is always a good thing - even if you cannot honour your father first.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

But Father is not here.

[ruthea.livejournal.com]

Nataku...?

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Yes?

[ruthea.livejournal.com]

...Are you alright?

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

No.

Father is not here and it is Father's Day.

[ruthea.livejournal.com]

Nataku...many people's fathers are not here, and many people's children are not here either...

But that doesn't mean that you should allow yourself to become upset like this...You can't help being here anymore than we can. You love your father, and he knows that. You don't have to do more than that.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

No, he's here.

I have not found him yet.

I have three people looking with me, but I have not found him. I'll keep searching, but I failed to find him before today. Haven't I failed?

[ruthea.livejournal.com]

...


No, Nataku, you haven't.

I promise.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Really?

Why?

[ruthea.livejournal.com]

Because you've tried very hard.

Just because you haven't quite succeeded yet doesn't mean that you've failed.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Oh.

All right.

But, it hurts in my chest because he's not here so I can celebrate and honor him today... I don't know what to do.

[ruthea.livejournal.com]

Why don't you spend time around others today?

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

I don't know.

[ruthea.livejournal.com]

Well...whatever you decide.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

...

All right.

[littleblackcait.livejournal.com]

... Nataku. Your father doesn't have to be here for you to honor him. As long as you care about him... then you are honoring him. To love someone is the biggest honor you can give.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

But am I not supposed to buy him ties and cake?

[littleblackcait.livejournal.com]

Well, you can. It's not mandatory, though. People celebrate the holiday in different ways, and some don't celebrate it at all. I was always taught, though, that to honor a parent is to love them, and to be the best person one can be.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Really?

[littleblackcait.livejournal.com]

Really. I promise.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

All right.

But without Father being here, without having found him .. it's ... very difficult for me.

[littleblackcait.livejournal.com]

.... I can understand that. It's... hard, to be separated from a parent you care for deeply. And there's no shame in missing him. Don't let that hurt you too much, though. Remember the good things, even if it's just a fragment, and know that he cares about you as much as you care for him. That's something not even distance can take away.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

I shouldn't let it hurt me? Why?

Really? But what if he doesn't remember me? Does he still care?

[littleblackcait.livejournal.com]

Because hurting over something you cannot control is senseless. And because your friends want you to be happy.

Even if something happened and he didn't remember... I don't think a parent could completely forget their own child. Even if he doesn't remember your name... there'll always be a small spark deep down that will love you.

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Really? But why do they want me to be happy?

... That makes me feel better. When I find Father, that gives me ... hope that he will still love me.

[amberincarnate.livejournal.com]

Nataku? What is the matter? Were you ill? Is that why you couldn't meet me today?

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

It's Father's Day and Father is not here. I have not found him yet.

Yes. It hurts in my chest.

[amberincarnate.livejournal.com]

But does that mean... that mean you don't want to go to the town with me? If you're feeling ill, I will come right away!

[[ooc: 8D she doesn't get all the father's day angst. D8 SRY?]]

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

I cannot.

All right.

[ooc: 8D! She's a good friend!]

[amberincarnate.livejournal.com]

[transcribed] Oh, Nataku, where does it hurt?

[[ooc: X3 She tries~]]

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

[transcribed] In my chest, around my heart. There is a painful squeeze there.

[ooc: *hugs Kohaku*]

[amberincarnate.livejournal.com]

How long has it been hurting? [angel power dealio goeth here~]

[[ooc: 8D *she hugs you back!*]]

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Since I realized what day it was today, and that Father is not yet found.

[pause]

I feel a little better.

[ooc: Ah poor Kohaku, has to deal with angst~ XDD;; Yay and a break from the angst icons! Kohaku rules!]

[amberincarnate.livejournal.com]

Truly? Well... I know today is a day for fathers, but I do not think that your father would be mad or sad that you were doing something for yourself today. We are both looking for him, so we will find him soon! I promise.

Ah! Really? [more powers woo] I don't sense anything wrong with your heart, but at least my powers are doing something for the anxiety.

[[ooc: XDDD She's used to getting it from herself, not from others. She does try her best! XDDD Also, her hair is pink. Nataku might want to notice that. XDD]]

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Really? ... He wouldn't? People have been telling me that, but I ... worry.

... Anxiety?

... [pause] Your hair is pink. Is that the pink thing that you got? Who gave it to you?

[ooc: Aww! XDDD She does~! YAY PINK HAIR!]

[amberincarnate.livejournal.com]

But if you don't live on and enjoy yourself, then I've found it makes the people around you very unhappy, especially the people who you care about the most. The best we can do right now is keep looking! You haven't failed at all!

I remember how I felt when I couldn't find someone that was important to me. The feeling that you have right now has to be the same, since you're looking for someone important too.

Oh? [pause, then eureka! XDD she forgot] Oh, yes! Kio helped me color my hair! Pink is a nice color, I think.

[[ooc: XDD oh god, I'm doing so much motivational speaking right now. XDD insanity. 8DDD LESS EMO ICONS. AHAHAHAHA. >D]]

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

Oh. If you all think so, then... I'm glad that it's right.

Really? Do you still have that feeling?

I see. It's ... a nice color, yes. I .. like it. Should I color my hair, would my parents like it?

[ooc: Yay! Go motivational speaking! XDD;! EVERYONE WINS! YAY!]

[amberincarnate.livejournal.com]

Mmmhm. I won't lie!

Well, yes... but it's for a different person now. The first person I found, eventually.

Would you like to? I can ask Kio what he thinks!

[[ooc: ♥]]

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

I believe you.

I don't understand, but ... I hope that the anxiety goes away.

I don't know, but if they would like it a different color, I wouldn't mind.

[ooc: Wins~]

[amberincarnate.livejournal.com]

Mmhm~ I hope yours goes away too~

Well, I'll ask Kio, then~

... Would you like me to stay with you, at least?

[[ooc: 8D Want me to post something asking Kio about hair dye-age?]]

[fragmentedangel.livejournal.com]

...

All right.

... Yes.

[ooc: XDD; Sure, sure. Yesum!]