paradisalost | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

Who: Kallen (

emit) and Rookie (

helljumped)
What: Fricking fairies
When: December 5th, evening time
Where: Hallway, then room 707
Rating: ... idk

It was December in Paradisa, the fifth to be exact. Snow had appeared the night before, big fluffy white flakes looking as perfect as only the magical world could make them. They adorned the ground outside in an unending blanket, sprawled out as far as the eye could see. The castle itself was festive already, too. The large crystalline tree in the lobby was awe inspiring as could be, and that even before the subject or ornaments. Wreathes and garlands added festivity elsewhere, upper floors, stairwells and hallways to name a few places.

Kallen couldn't help but be a little awed as she walked down the hall, occasionally eying the decor above doors and on the walls between rooms. No matter what happened due to the castle, sometimes it was the simpler things that made it a little better place to be. She liked this time of year. The mood and the well wishes and the warm feelings gave things a good atmosphere.

That was at least true in part because the yearly tradition of warped mistletoe had completely slipped her mind thus far.

The redhead blinked suddenly as if woken from a dream and turned to her friend walking beside her, removing her eyes from a garland woven with silver tinsel. She had a slightly embarrassed look on her face as she spoke, trying not to sound too sheepish.

"Sorry, you'll have to repeat what you just said. I wasn't really paying attention."

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"I noticed."

That smile of his played across his face, giddy with a sort of child-like enthusiasm that he was trying to play off by glancing towards one of the decorations. It was obvious, though, that the holiday-like atmosphere was playing a large part to his good mood.

"I was only saying that I'm a little impressed with the castle's taste in decorations."

Kallen laughed a little and elbowed him in the side to get his attention, more than mildly amused by the expression on his face. Times like this made her enjoy her stay in the castle, if only because she could see different sides of those she had come to call her friends. Childlike joy, for one.

Granted, Rookie was normally smiling, but she was learning how to differentiate between the types he used. More and more she saw him with the laid back and comfortable smile that indicated he was somewhat eat ease. It was something that she enjoyed for whatever reason.

When she had his attention, she grinned and nodded to a wreath covered in little, round green lights that twinkled every so often.

"Not used to stuff like this I guess. You should see the tree in the lobby if you haven't already. It's pretty amazing."

He gives a few steps to the side out of reaction towards that elbow, before lightly bumping her back and keeping that same playful energy as he tossed a glance over towards the decoration. Then towards her to show he was listening.

"Neither am I." The smile gets a big bigger at the mention of the tree, before he was shaking his head. "And no, I haven't, but I'll be sure to swing down by the lobby later when I have the free time."

Then likely proceed to end up under it, as that was usually the way things worked out when it came to his napping locations. Though, it wouldn't be because he picked the spot out, so much as admiring the lights and then closing his eyes a bit longer than intended.

But at least he wouldn't be all that hard to spot, for that very reason.

"You should, the tree's sort of mesmerizing. In a good way, I mean," she chuckled as they reached the stairwell and began to ascend. "Anyway, we're going to have to figure out something for our morning runs, unless you want to run in all the snow. If that's the case, you're on your own for that."

Kallen was kidding of course, and she made sure Rookie knew that through her grin. While running in snow wasn't up there on her list of desired things to do, she'd be up for it if he was. She'd done worse, after all. As long as she dressed for it and didn't expect to get as far as they normally did, it'd be fine.

Her eyes drifted to the ceiling of the staircase that had garlands, this time with gold and silver tinsel draping off of them. The corner of her mouth quirked up a little higher than her already present smile as she stopped walking to stare some more.

"Aw, come on. Since when did a little snow hurt anyone?" His hand will move to hold onto the staircase's railings as they started to climb up, keeping his gaze on the one besides him with a teasing look. "But we could always mix it up a bit. Jog around the castle some days, outside in the snow some others."

Then he'll stop when realizing where her focus had turned towards once again, slowly tilting his head back to examine the lovely decoration above them before letting his eyes fall right back down to her.

"You could always decorate your room with some of those, you know."

"If you keep talking like that, the castle might send a huge blizzard our way and trap us in the castle for a week straight," she replied absently. "Then you'd have your answer. A good majority of this place would probably kill each other out of boredom. And yeah, switching it up is good."

When she was done staring, Rookie received a shake of her head in response, her red hair moving about as she indicated her negation of the suggestion. Leaning against the wall for a moment, Kallen looked back at him. Her smile was still there, but the feeling of it changed to one of remembrance.

"The decorations in my room are there for a reason. If you noticed, they're pretty mismatched and... weird. But they're from friends I've made here, most of them gone now."

She shrugged, seemingly not too bothered by this vein of conversation, and in all honesty, she really wasn't anymore. Being in Paradisa for over a year (plus some events at home) had helped her to realize that everyone's time with one another was limited in some way. It sounded like a morbid though, sure, but it served as a reminder to Kallen that she should spend as much time with those she cared for as she could.

"Doesn't sound all that different from the usual." He mumbled softly in response, glancing up and away towards some other decorations on the ceiling that happened to catch his view. Ones that mostly had red ribbons and silver bells intertwined with tinsel, but he'll fall silent to listen until he was sure she was done talking.

"Mismatched and weird, huh?" Rookie mused, giving Kallen a second's glance before his focused turned back towards those decorations. "Just goes to show that everyone is different in their own way. No surprise that the gifts you get from your friends would be too."

Then, as if by random inspiration, he'll reach up to try and swat at the lowest hanging bell. When his fingertips bumped against the metal and he heard a sharp, distinct jingle, the soldier gave a delighted laugh.

"Yes! Didn't think I'd get it."

The redhead nodded in response to his assessment about the stuff she had. Her friends were indeed different, all in (mostly) good ways of course. A good number of them could summon their inner selves and battle creatures inside a TV world. Two could crawl up walls and shoot web. One, or two depending, was a member of a club that catered to the desires of a certain demographic. Another was just a child, but she often times had words of wisdom befitting someone three times her age. There were definitely more than that, but off the top of her head, Kallen knew she had been lucky so far.

She opened her mouth to say as much, but Rookie's exclamation of victory caused her to stop and look at him before laughing as well. It was certainly impossible to forget this friend, her closest one at present. He could always cheer her up or get her mind off things without even trying, something she was thankful for more than once, and she always felt at ease around him. That wasn't a fact she took for granted as she tried give him the same feeling in return. Whether it always worked or not, she didn't know. All she could do was try.

Words don't come for the moment. She just stood there, smiling at it all before she turned and started to continue up the stairs.

He gave a smile in return, bright and vivid. Though he may not have known what it was that she was so happy about exactly, he was still content that he had made her laugh - through unintentionally means or otherwise - and once she started walking, he was quick to follow. Keeping in pace a step behind her as attention drifted from one sparkling item to the next, but it was only because he was still not use to all of this.

Having been here for nearly half a year now, and having all these strange and new experiences were ones that sometimes made him wonder if he really was just dreaming all of it. That he was still underneath that staircase back home, surrounded by his teammates, and catching up on some much needed rest before the next mission.

It was thoughts like this that were usually kept to himself, of course, tucked away in the back of his mind and saved only for those moments when he was by himself long enough to consider the possibility that he might actually wake up one of these days. That he'll open his eyes and see the familiar faces that he thought were gone, and remember everything that he had once lost while here.

But also forget the people that made this place great.

Which was why, for that very reason, he appreciated being in Kallen's company.

They soon reached the top of the steps, and Kallen turned the corner to arrive in the seventh floor hallway before looking back at Rookie with a grin, one that seemed very pleased about things at the moment. Beckoning for him to hurry up, she kept walking towards their intended destination of his room. The tech he had collected as well as the promised close up look at his armor was a thing that was on her mind for the past few days. It was a new experience, and those were always welcomed, especially when they promised to be relatively safe compared to most things the castle offered.

The decorations on this floor were similar, if not identical to those on the previous, so her attention wasn't as split as it had been. This meant that she was waiting between doors 705 and 707 by the time Rookie was approaching. Kallen was a little antsy, simply out of anticipation for the aforementioned promise, the smile on her face clear evidence of that.

Her back was to the wall a few feet behind her when her friend arrived. That was also when she saw the little glowing orb. Sparkles, too.

"What the--"

Rookie had been taking his time, once they had finally reached his floor. The redhead's gesturing only making him give an amused look as he placed one foot in front of the other in a slow and casual walk.

"Calm down, Kallen. The stuff isn't going to go anywhere, I promise."

But he will prove to pick up the pace a little, even if he was honestly in no rush. There was still plenty of time left in the day, and he liked being out and about among all the interesting decorations. Not that his room was certainly lacking in any, having made a point to sort of holiday-it-up with a variety of things that would match with the rest of the castle's festivity.

Eventually, though, he'll come to a stop in front of her before that strange, little light made a point to catch his eye, causing him to lightly tilt his head as he turned to glance up at it. "Huh? What's tha- woah!"

As if on cue, the orb suddenly made a dive straight for him, which only caused the helljumper to release a few muttered swears as he instinctively ducked out of the way... but not before a little dust fell onto his shoulders and on the top of his head.

Edited 2011-12-08 07:32 (UTC)

What came next, after Rookie tossed a suspicious glance over his shoulder to where the giggling fairy was now hovering, was an expression of mild confusion. One that flickered there for a minimum amount of seconds, before those brown eyes drifted to where Kallen was standing with a silent, almost questioning look.

And then, almost instantly, he was moving. Closing the distance between the two of them in a matter of seconds as one hand made the attempt to grab her solidly by the waist. The other lifting to rest gently, but firmly against the back of her head as he pushed the woman into the wall behind them. Though, doing it in a way where he made sure it was his arm that got most of the impact before finally leaning in to pull her into a kiss.

"Rook, what're you--"

The young woman didn't even have time to fully respond before she was being taken in his arms and pressed against the wall behind her. Instinctively, her hands went up to rest on his shoulders, one on each as she was pulled in closer. She knew what was going to happen, and she couldn't help but internally panic a bit. There hadn't been a moment like this for her since...

Glitter. From those things. Kallen then knew what she had been forgetting, but before she could process anymore, she saw the faint flicker of the golden substance sprinkling down around her. Of course, feelings of panic flew out the metaphorical window, and she found herself gladly returning the advances of the (now very) familiar man before her. She gripped his shoulders tightly, bracing herself as their lips met.

It was a gentle meeting at first, at least on her part, before the glitter's added effects fully took hold and increased her boldness. She pressed into the kiss a little more as one hand moved from his shoulder to the nape of his neck, fingers idly playing with some of his hair.

Despite the magical effect, or due to them, Kallen felt comfortable with this. She felt good, or hell, she might even go for great at this point. Warmth was flooding her body, and there were no nerves screaming at her that this whole situation was wrong. In fact, it was almost as if she belonged like this.

Such a magical time of year.

There was a slight flinch when he felt her hand move and rest on the back of his neck. Something he did out of reflex, when considering the neural interface, but it was not anything that caused him any actual discomfort. In fact, the touch caused Rookie to give an appreciate murmur, before he was lifting his own hand from her waist and moving to tug her as close as comfort would allow.

He hadn't done anything like this in months. Maybe even longer than that, when considering all the things going on back home, so the fact he was doing this now and out of the blue would have certainly confused him... if not for the magic currently affecting his judgement. A part of him understood, that whatever was going on was probably the castle's fault. Hell, a good portion of him knew that - but as he shifted in a way to tilt her head back and met her boldness with an eager, almost playful response, he couldn't help that sliver of a smirk that appeared every now and again.

Kallen felt the flinch, and magic be damned, she almost pulled away. She would have, at least, if it hadn't been for that murmur. It sent a rather nice tingly feeling through her body, one that urged her to continue for a little longer. Of course the magical fairy dust helped with that, too. Yup. Regardless of the cause, she let her fingers tangle themselves in his hair more as she moved to stand slightly on her tip toes to deepen the kiss. He might have been cursed at for his height, but at that moment, she rather enjoyed it.

Smirking. Of course he'd be smirking. She could just tell, no matter if she was feeling it or not, which she was. Not that it mattered. Kallen thought she knew him well enough to know that he could be a smug bastard when the situation called for it, and apparently he thought this one was well enough. Or, the magic made him think that. It was a tricky call. Either way, the redhead would meet his smugness and raise him a little more.

The hand not messing with his hair was moved from his shoulder and down across his chest to rest in the middle of it. There she let her nails lightly brush over the front of his shirt before she gripped a portion of it and tugged it lightly, causing him to come in even closer. If he wanted to smirk, she decided to give him a reason to.

It was really hard for Rookie not to enjoy whatever this was, magic or no magic, and that tug was met with very little resistance as he pressed into that kiss with a soft, low growl. An action that had a sort of underlying tenderness to it, which may or may not have been intentional, given that Rook still had no idea what part of this was magic and what part of this was just him.

But in the end he did smirk. One that lingered there for far longer than it probably should have, before he grew slightly more adventurous. Having been able to almost sense that challenge hiding in there somewhere, and for that very reason causing him to want to respond back with more energy. Even if there were still some very faint signs that he was subconsciously holding himself back, but in the subtle way he went about carefully sliding both his hands down her back before he was attempting to lift her up.

And then he was heading for his room since, tempting as it may have been to stay out here in the open, Rookie felt it was probably better to go ahead and shift this to someplace more private.

That was one thing Kallen disliked about Paradisa in general. When something... 'nice' came along during an episode of castle induced motivation, it was really hard to tell what was real and what wasn't, especially in December. But it wasn't like Kallen was thinking about that at all, not when she felt the low growl Rookie gave off as she tugged him towards her. Her response was an almost inaudible contented noise, which grew slightly louder as his hands slid down her back. The feeling was nice and welcome, and she gave off a slight, involuntary shiver as they got lower.

However, the noise turned into one of surprise when he gripped her thighs and lifted her up so she was just about level with him. Normally, her first instinct would have been to struggle, but since the magic was still in effect, she instead found herself tightening her thighs around his waist, keeping her legs bent at the knee so she could land easily if she needed to. Not that she thought she'd have to.

At the same time, both hands quickly retreated back to his shoulders so she could hold herself upright against him without the risk of falling backwards. Her grip was was strong, but not so much that it would be painful. The last thing she wanted right now was to make him flinch again, since that indirectly affected her, too. It was an offshoot of not wanting to hurt those close to her. Most people knew how that want.

And while all this was happening, the kiss stayed unbroken. Somehow.

It was a shame that Rookie didn't really know anything about this whole December thing until now, even if he had heard the rumors about there being something special about this month. Both through off-hand comments from friends and conversations that he just so happened to pick up over the journals whenever he was sitting in his room and listening to the castle's general chatter. And had he known that one day he would find himself in this kind of situation, he might have been able to better prepare himself for it.

... Which would have been his thought process, if he wasn't currently savoring that surprised sound she made with a delighted, under-his-breath chuckle and adjusting the way he was holding her. Simply because he wanted to make sure that the both of them were comfortable as he finally came to a stop in front of his door, before he ran into a slight problem. Seeing as he couldn't... really reach the handle when his hands were currently preoccupied.

One good thing about ODSTs, though? Their knack for improvising.

So thanks to a brief second to think things through, Rook was soon making a move to prop Kallen against the door. Just enough to allow his hand freedom to clumsily grab the handle and turn it, before quickly going back to supporting her weight as he nudged it open the rest of the way. Throughout all this doing his best not to break the kiss between them - partially thanks to the magic, he's sure - but also because it was not something he honestly wanted to stop.

The problem with that though, is one way or another, these things always did.

As he started making his way down the room's hall and towards the living room, making sure he was closing that door behind him with his shoe in order to stop any unwanted visitors - fawk you, Glitter and Sparkles - something in his mind seemed to focus. Gradually, at first, until it was strong enough for Rookie to take hold of and actually... comprehend what it was that he had been doing for the past couple of minutes. Which only caused the soldier to come to a complete halt in the middle of the room when he realized that the magic had worn off, before he was quickly pulling himself away from her.

... An action that was, in retrospect, something he may have done a bit too quickly, as her weight caused whatever balance he may have had prior to pretty much vanish, before he was toppling backwards with a loud, distinct swear. One that would likely be Kallen's only clue that they were falling, besides the fact that the floor seemed to be getting a whole lot closer all of a sudden.

The chuckle was met by a throaty grumble from Kallen, but only a half hearted one. She knew well that pretending to be annoyed right now was pointless, especially considering the fact that she found the noise involuntarily turning into one of honest appreciation for what was going down. If her head had been totally clear right then, she would have known that she couldn't attribute all the nice feelings to magic. That would have been too much. It would have been, and probably would be later, obvious that there was some part of her-- larger than she'd like to admit-- that was genuinely enjoying this, and blaming it all on the magic seemed wrong.

Though, being pushed against a door like that was a new one for the redhead, but she wasn't going to complain, certainly not while all... this was still happening. Braced by the door, she found herself adjusting her hold on him, too. Her hands moved from his shoulders as her arms went around his neck in a combination of a hug and a, well, a cling. Legs mimicked that in a way, making their way completely around his waist with her ankles locking behind him just above his rear.

They were in his place now, Kallen knew from the slam of the door as they kept moving. Just like him, she was slowly regaining her senses now that the fairies and their glitter were out of the picture, but honestly, she wasn't as quick to pull away as he was, though she was thankful he did. Things would have been extra awkward otherwise, and that was the absolute last thing they'd need.

She heard the sharp swear and felt the shift of balance right away. It was enough to know what was going to happen. As he want backwards, she quickly moved her arms so they were behind his head. She felt bad already, but she'd feel even worse if he ended up with a concussion or a cracked skull. However, this didn't leave much room at all between them, and when Rookie hit the floor, he was going to receive the brunt of Kallen's weight on top of him. Probably a tangle of legs, too, seeing as she had attempted to let him go right before the fall.

Things were going to be interesting to say the least.

Edited 2011-12-10 16:13 (UTC)

It'd take a lot more than bumping his head on the carpet to do that kind of damage, or so he would have said had he known, but the gesture was still appreciated all the same. That is, of course, if Rookie wasn't more interested in Kallen's own safety, which is why he'll make a last-ditch effort to wrap both his arms around her to hopefully minimize any of her injuries. Since, well, this was kind of his fault in one way or another.

There was an 'oof' as he landed, and then another grunt when the one he'd previously been carrying proved to follow along, which was just enough to temporarily knock the wind out of him. A sensation that wasn't all that foreign, truth be told, but it was still never a pleasant experience whenever it did happen. So it takes him quite a bit to say anything that wasn't the sound of him gasping for air, before he'll eventually just let his arms drop down to his sides and close his eyes for a moment. Mainly to try and calm down so he could actually breath, but also so he could get the chance to regroup his thoughts in order to form coherent words.

"Kallen, look, I'm -" He paused when realizing his voice was still a bit hoarse, causing him to give a short cough before he made the attempt to speak again. "I'm sorry. I tried to stop but..."

Then he'll fall quiet, because at that point he had reopened his eyes and noticed that she was still... sort of on top of him. Making the slight hint of red in his face to become a lot more apparent as he moved to sit up, and that tone of his softer as he uttered the next couple of words.

"I don't know what happened."

Kallen landed on top of him with a grunt of her own, mainly due to the back of his head hitting her arms a little harder than she thought. Thanks to his arms around her, she didn't roll off of him to land at an awkward angle or anything too bad, though she was pressed rather closely to him, and it was different now than it had been mere moments ago. She was a lot more conscious of their proximity this time, and while she didn't find it uncomfortable per say, she knew full well now was not a time to dwell on something like that. Instead, she somehow managed to shift her weight so he could breathe more easily. Her arms stayed where they were under his head, and she sort of had a feeling they would until he moved. Until then, she sort of lingered there, hanging over him.

Words failed her right then, so she was there, waiting for him to recover enough to speak. The majority of her refused to allow herself to think about what his reaction might be. Some of the possibilities were very unlikely, while others were all too real, and she didn't exactly want to focus on that when things were going to be awkward enough between them.

Exhaling softly and a little shakily, she started a bit when she heard her name spoken. A concerned look briefly crosses her features when he coughed, but it was sort of replaced by her own reddening expression when hel feel silent. She realized she was still on top of him, so when he moved a little to sit up, she scrambled off of him, removing her arms from their spot under his head. Soon she was sitting back, legs folded under her as she absently rubbed one of her arms, more out of distraction than pain. Her response didn't come right away, but when it did, she wasn't able to make eye contact with him.

"Not your fault. It was the castle. Every December, shit like this happens. I guess mistletoe got boring early on," she grumbled, an annoyed expression evident now. "I was stupid and forgot about it, so..."

Trailing off wasn't intentional, but could she really say? If there was anything, it wasn't going to come to mind anytime soon.

This was one of those moments where Rookie desperately wished he hadn't take off his armor, because at least then he might have been able to hide his embarrassment a little easier. With his brain still trying to catch up on everything that had happen, and the fact that he hadn't been able to control himself - magic or no magic - only caused that silence he'd fallen into to linger just a moment longer, before he finally shook his head with a sigh.

"Don't make it out to be your fault, either." He paused there, frowning when he caught sight of her rubbing that arm, before he turned away and sent a glance towards the door. Mainly to double check that it was closed, considering he didn't want a repeat of earlier to make things even more awkward, before he was making the attempt to stand up and put some space between them. "Just means we have to be more careful around glowing balls of light till whatever those things are disappear."

If they disappeared, and a good portion of him wanted to see them gone. Reasons being that he knew there were some parts that hadn't been all magic. That it had been him, and that it could have just been a simple kiss if not for whatever that was. Which is why it bothered him, and made Rookie want to very quickly bury that feeling so he could try and figure it out later.

So he buckled that thought down, gave her a smile and then leaned forwards to offer her a hand up. "Still doesn't feel like I should be any less sorry, though. You okay?"

"I wasn't going to," was all she said in response to his first statement. It was the truth, too. She was vividly remembering some of the... events of last season, and her sense of responsibility for those now seemed dumb compared to how she had felt then. It would have made her laugh if she had been with almost anyone else at this point. However, she was still here with Rookie, and laughing would have probably made things even more awkward.

When she saw him stand and turn away, she couldn't help but feel a little bit disappointed, which wasn't something she was expecting. Feelings like uncertainty and confusion, definitely, but not the sense of an unknown expectation falling through. In retrospect, she'd probably end up kicking herself for it later, but no one is fully in control of their emotions when the situation calls for it, especially not a young woman who had just been kissed the way she had.

The hand in front of her caught her off guard, as did the smile. She clearly looked taken aback when he spoke. It was one of those smiles, Kallen was almost positive. One of the ones he used to cover up what he was really thinking and feeling. Those were still being figured out on her end, since he was so damned thorough at concealing what he felt. It reminded her of a certain someone she had previously fallen for, and as much as she tried to deny it, these two had more similarities than she had initially thought, which was occasionally annoying to say the least.

However, it was the apology that stung most. Her logical side was screaming at her that he was simply being polite, careful even, since he probably wasn't sure how she was going to react. Despite knowing this, the pilot had always been, first and foremost, an emotional person, so it was inevitably that side that won out, basically by beating her logic into submission. Definitely not the smartest move, but seeing as logic was dead at moment, that didn't matter.

Emotional and open with those emotions was a good way to summarize her at times. She could hide things when she worked on it, but now... that wasn't going to work well. That didn't mean she wasn't going to try, though. Kallen attempted her own smile before shaking her head and standing on her own.

"I'm fine," she replied, attempting to keep the lie from being too obvious. The offered hand was disregarded as she stood up by herself, brushing herself off to keep her gaze away from his. "No need to be sorry, either. It wasn't something either of us would have done of our own free will, so we can forget about it."

She shook her head a bit and turned towards the door.

"I should go now, though. No idea if those things can break in or not."

That smiled faltered just a little when seeing her expression, sensing something was off, but not quite able to figure out what it was exactly. He'd likely put two and two together later, when his mind wasn't trying to block everything out so he could try and act like nothing's changed. That things between the two of them were still the same just to make this whole thing a lot more easier, but he had a very vague feeling that it wasn't going to work.

So when he noticed she didn't want his help, he slowly dropped his hand and backed off. Keeping silent and listening to her with a slight raise of an eyebrow, until there was something she said that caused him to involuntarily flinch and glance away. One that he did his best to hide, but it took Rookie far longer to revert his expression into something more neutral as his mind tossed and turned over what it was that she had meant by that, and why it had bothered him so much.

No, on second thought, he knew why it had bothered him so much. He just wasn't sure if he wanted to admit it to himself just yet.

Only when he realized that she was trying to leave, however, was he finally able snap out of his thoughts and stretch a hand out towards her. Whether it was for reasons of wanting to stop her, or just because he wanted to say something, he wasn't sure, but he didn't like the way this situation felt. Didn't like leaving things the way they were, and he desperately wanted to say something to fix it... but there was something in him that made him hesitate at the last second, causing that hand to reluctantly fall back down at his side before he just gave a small nod and glanced down at the floor.

"... All right." It was quiet, barely above a whisper, but it was because in some ways, he knew he was going to regret having said it later.

Very vague feelings like that should never really be ignored, and this case was no exception. It was that very mentality, acting like it changed nothing or he hadn't been affected, that felt to Kallen like she had been slapped without even being able to defend herself. It stung a lot, and it felt unwarranted. She didn't expect him to stand there like he had no idea what to do, but regaining himself so quickly and seemingly brushing it aside... that hurt, too, more than she'd expected. She wasn't dismissing his usual habits or forgetting how he worked, as she knew he was the type who let his actions speak louder than his words. In actuality, that's what was going on at the moment. His actions were (supposedly) communicating very clearly that nothing had changed, and he wanted to move past what happened, let things go back to the way they had been. And normally, she'd have been all over that idea.

But this wasn't normally. That much had been apparent when the magic started to wear off, and she'd been painfully aware how much of the enjoyment ended up not being the castle's responsibility. That piece of information coupled with the new set of thoughts and emotions it brought caused her to internally panic. Time to sort things out would be very nice. Very needed, too. Kallen would have been willing to tell him as much if it hadn't been for his insistency that things seem some degree of normal for the two of them. It was hardly normal for her right now, and if he wasn't going to share some of his reactions with her, she wasn't going to burden him with hers.

Unfortunately, due to Kallen avoiding his gaze, she missed the entirety of his reaction to her statement. Had she seen it, she might have said something, but seeing as that wasn't the case, there was obviously nothing for her to say or act upon. By that point, she had turned to face the door and stated her intention to go, and once again, she missed his reaction. Reaching for her... she certainly would have stayed if she had seen or if he had simply said something. One or two words expressing his discomfort with the situation or his desire to not leave things hanging would have had her rooted in place.

Albeit under different, and more dramatic, circumstances, the current situation was eerily close to one had experienced back home with the person she had possessed similar feelings for. And, like last time, the other person was saying nothing to stop her. Hell, this time he was even agreeing with her, and she refused to face him now, not even sure she could if she wanted to.

So, all she did was nod without looking back before she opened the door, stepped through, and closed it behind her.

Edited 2011-12-11 22:46 (UTC)

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