paradisalost | five ► say my name

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lloyd irving

five ► say my name

[Colette]

Want to look for a place in town later? I found a job, so now it's just a matter of saving up and moving.

[It'd also be a good distraction from Joshua-related things.]

We can have lunch, too. I dunno if you've done much with the baking club yet, but I'll test-run anything. [He's so grinning at that.]

-----

[Goku]

Hey, it's been a while. How are you holding up?

-----

[dictated]

[Lloyd stifles a yawn.]

Would anyone be interested in custom-made furniture or anything like that? I can make smaller objects, like jewelry or keepsake boxes. My dad taught me how to make weapons and armor, but I'm nowhere near as good as he is. Plus, I have no idea where to find a forge...

Materials aren't really an issue, so let me know if you have any ideas.

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Of course it's okay!

[He knew that snapping at her back then might make her more hesitant, and he really hates that, but... sometimes, friends push. He hesitates for a moment, then reaches out to take her hand, his warmth tangible even through the tough fabric of his gloves.

He's here.]

Colette... [He squeezes her hand faintly.] I'm sorry for yelling at you. You've been through so much, and I don't even know the half of it. It... scared me, because it was just like when we started our journey.

It's been a long time since then, but you can tell me anything. I promise.

[it's amazing how much a simple action can make her feel stronger... but it's not really surprising, she's always felt stronger when he's around. So she smiles softly at the action, and walks closer to him than she was before]

You don't have to be sorry, I think... I'd forgotten a lot of things. I really needed to hear what you had to say. [she then pauses, as if trying to figure out where's the best place to begin]

Ah... Joshua and I met about a year ago! I didn't know very much about him then, but I've learned a lot more. His... the horns on his head make him into a different person, and he doesn't talk about his life back before he got the horns. But there's one thing he talks about all the time, his sister. She's his loss, so... he doesn't remember very much about her, but he's been told a few things by other people from his world.

[she takes another pause, glancing up at Lloyd to make sure that her intro made sense]

[... Wow, she's really close. Haha...] O-Okay. [If Lloyd is too harsh, he trusts her to say if he's wrong. That's the best thing they have-- an absolute trust in one another, a mutual understanding that goes beyond description.]

His sister, huh... [Sounds familiar. His expression takes on a distant look: a little sad, a little hardened. He remembers Mithos, of course. And he remembers how they wanted to save him.] Keep going.

[she nods] I think her name is Rosette, and... I think she might have looked like me. When we met, he thought I- [she looks down, a guilty look on her face] that I was his sister. I tried to tell him that I was from a different world, but he just thought the castle changed my memories like they changed his. B-Because he would be dangerous, everyone thought it would be safer if I just... went along with it.

But he found out that I wasn't really his sister first, and he... h-he was really mad that I had lied to him. [that guilt on her face just intensifies, she feels like there's something should could have done to stop this] S-So, I hid in the Dead Zone where I would be safe.

I stayed out there for a while, and while I was there... he said that if I didn't come back, he would hurt other people instead. In the end, he didn't, but... [it's obvious that scared her more than her own life being threatened]

Colette...

[He's not surprised that Colette would lie to keep someone happy. She knows it's wrong, but she's done it before, and she would do it again to protect people she cares about. He doesn't approve of it, but this isn't about Lloyd scolding her. Obviously if she had to flee into the Dead Zone, that meant she understood the risks associated with Joshua.

It's terrifying. This kid with demon horns... He sounds crazy and unpredictable and obsessed with his sister, and of course he wouldn't like being lied to.

God, they've been through this before. Why do they have to go through it again? Is it possible for them to save anyone?

... Yes. It could be. They have to try. Because living in fear of Joshua and what he can do just isn't an option.

He squeezes her hand again, to remind her that he's there.]

Let's find a way to help him. Until then... I'll protect you.

[She's not sure what she was afraid of... That if she told Lloyd, he would hate Joshua? But no, the first thing he does is promise that he wants to help Joshua. It makes a lump rise in her throat, but it's the kind where it's relief. And then the squeeze of his hand, she takes a deep breath and nods]

Y-Yes. And, Yuan and a few others were really amazing! While I was away, they took his horns and he was normal for a few months. He.. he's really very kind. Sometimes he's too serious, and he feels really guilty about what he's done... but he's very kind, and I'm so glad I got to spend time with him.

Now- somehow his horns are back, and... I don't think he remembers everything that happened. We spoke over the journal and he wasn't.. he didn't seem to remember that he was angry at me. [she sound unsure, but hopeful at the idea]

So maybe this time, I'll be able to help save him.

[For Lloyd, killing someone isn't a last resort. It's not even an option. Lives are precious, and no one has the right to decide when one should end. As long as someone still breathes, they can change. What's the point of executing someone in a world that brings them back, anyway?

It's the horns that's doing it, not Joshua himself. That much is clear.]

Yeah.

[It's more than an affirmation, it's a promise. He smiles down at her, then looks away. He's apparently forgotten that they're holding hands.]

Thanks for telling me all of this.

[she's partly aware of it, in the way that she knows she doesn't want to let go of his hand. That support, the warmth in his voice, and then his smile. She's missed it all so much.... she smiles back]

N-No... I'm sorry I kept it from you for so long.

[she shouldn't have fretted over him like that, decided what was best for Lloyd without even giving him a chance. She feels silly, but now she's just in this state of calm... happy relief]

Thank you for listening to me.

[That looks a lot better than her hesitant sadness. He hates seeing anyone suffer, especially Colette, and...]

You don't have to thank me for listening. [Only now does he realize he's holding her hand, as he was about to ruffle her hair or something. He freezes for a moment, fingers still twined with hers.]

Um...

[He kind of doesn't want to let go.]

... Is this okay?

[she looks at him curiously, not sure what he's saying 'um' about. But then when she follows his gaze, and then sees him blushing a bit... WELL THAT PRETTY MUCH MAKES HER BLUSH TOO ASDGHASDGHA. And she... has the same thought as well. She doesn't want to let go either]

Oh! Y-Yes... [she tries to make it out that she's not blushing by smiling asdghlsdgh WHY ARE THEY THE MOST DORKY AWKARD]

It's okay.

[Because they are. They've held hands before, but... it just feels different somehow. Just a little. It's enough to make him scratch the back of his head awkwardly and look away, but of course he's still holding her hand.]

So, um, you had a place in mind?

[she can nearly feel his awkwardness, and it's enough to make her a bit pink in the face. But she feels happy all the same, so she answers without any stuttering or weird pauses, haha]

Yes! I think we're almost there. [she looks ahead and points down one of the roads ahead with her free hand] It's that way.

Phew. I'm so hungry I think I could eat a dragon by myself.

[And no one was surprised.]

[she giggles at that] I'm sure you'll enjoy it, they make really good food!

[and then there's a pause as she looks around at the buildings, then back at Lloyd] I'm really exciting to live out here.

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