paradisalost | 029; dictated

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spike spiegel

029; dictated

[Jet used to say life goes in cycles, but to Spike, here it's more like a spiral. Lose everything you never really had until you're left with the nothing you started with -- all those ways of thinking that make you a productive member of society. Just wait around for the next suicide mission to pop up and spend the meantime catching up on some sleep. As it happened, Brock's cabin was conveniently left up for grabs, and Spike found his nice little getaway to not give a damn in.

After briefly getting cheered up by the mischief of the 'new gang' in town, he returns with a case of beer to the only place that has nothing but solitude to offer. Sure, it could still use a big TV and a fridge full of food, maybe a decent fan to get some of that musk out of there, but he isn't in the mood to be picky.

It's only after he makes himself comfortable on the couch that he hears something off to the side... Movement catches his eye, and he automatically draws his gun. In the shuffling that follows, the journal falls out of nowhere and opens just in time to pick up a screeching animal and the hollow sound of empty cans scattering to the ground from a nearby pile.]

Hey! [Gunshots fire, but from his shouting, it sounds like he only succeeded in scaring something away.] Sonofabitch... Raccoons now.

[So he'll admit to some drawbacks in this brilliant plan. Maybe the castle is trying to make a point with that journal he sees on the ground and reluctantly reaches for. Everything's always got to be complicated.] Might have had better luck with a tent. Can you wish up bear traps, or is that against the rules?

[Good job checking in, Spike.]

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[Oh, let her have her fun. (It's... been a while.) By now, she almost has herself convinced that this is like old times. Almost.]

And what's your plan if it does?

[If he had any clue who he was talking to, he'd possibly be having a much more serious conversation. He'll blame the raccoon later.]

I'm sure I can improvise something.

[Since nobody has come knocking at his door selling bear traps... What good are magic journals if they don't deliver?]

[Typical response. But it does manage to make her crack a small smile over there on the other end. ... She'd missed him. Stupid charm and all.]

You were always good at that.

[...

That pretty much confirms that she knows him from somewhere. Here or...?]

I've had enough practice.

[... Oh hey. Getting warmer.]

Then taking on a rodent shouldn't be a problem.

[Okay, she's good at this game.]

No. I've taken on bigger ones than that.

[Well. She's had a fair amount of practice herself.]

It's the nature of the world we live in.

[... Or lived, as the case may be.]

[The world we live in.]

How long have you been here?

Just over a week.

[The answer comes out automatically, but as it does... she pauses as the ramifications of this begin to hit her. If he'd been here the whole time, why had it taken this long for her to find him? It wasn't as if there were a whole solar system potentially between them this time....

There's that nagging feeling again, the one she can't quite pinpoint, but is growing stronger this time around. Something is.... Then again, maybe he hasn't been here long either. She has to ask.]

What about you?

[He's quiet himself for a while, trying to decide something.]

At least a year.

[She lets out a breath she wasn't even aware she'd been holding, but then falls silent again. What the hell does she even say to that? She thought that things would start to clear up for her as time began to go on, but she's now only more confused than ever.]

That's... quite a while.

[Sure, it sounds stupid, but that's what she finally blurts out when her voice comes back to her.]

[There's a possibility that's occurring to him, but he doesn't want to risk saying it out loud.]

Longer than I was expecting.

[There's so much that she doesn't understand. The questions continue to jumble around in her mind, but she tries her best to bite them back. Her characteristic coolness hasn't been broken just yet, and allowing that to happen wouldn't be in her best interests.]

Isn't that how these things usually turn out?

[It won't start making sense even if she learns everything about it. That's something he accepted a long time ago.]

Usually, yeah. [He keeps talking and only paying attention to half of what he says.] Could be even longer. They said I'd been here before.

[Now might be about the time that she starts to get that sense, if she hasn't had an inkling of it already. But it still doesn't stop her from asking the question that she knows is stupid and useless.]

How?

I don't know. [He'd never tried to find out. Easier to accept whatever was given to him and wait to pay for it later.]

Wish I could have asked him a few things.

The other you?

[That feels... so weird to say. But what other term is there for it? The longer this conversation goes on, the less she understands.]

[There's a reason he's not usually the guy to explain these things.]

If you buy into that stuff. Most of it pretty hard to believe.

[No kidding.]

At this point, I might believe anything.

Careful about jinxing it. [Although he's normally the first one to do that. He's always been a bit of a hypocrite.]

[A fact that she can play off of quite nicely. Maybe it's time to track this conversation back to more familiar ground? It'd certainly make her feel better.]

Isn't that usually my line?

[Familiar.

He's quiet again, like it takes him a while to remember she asked him something.] That seems about right.

[It's not like him to be so... quiet with her. But it's not just that; there's something about his response too. That feeling from before is back, and this time, it's becoming impossible to push away.

She takes a pause herself, inhaling a deep breath. This has suddenly become... a little awkward, for reasons she can't even explain.]

It usually was.

[It's a good thing she can't see his pathetic excuse for a smile. He decides then to bring up the what he's only read about -- the legacy left from the journals, in pages he found himself always going back to. Being wrong is almost too much to handle, but everything only adds up to one thing.]

Julia. [That's all he says, but it's enough to take the risk.]

Spike.

[It's breathed out almost like a sigh of relief. If she hadn't known better, she could've sworn--

No, it doesn't matter now. He's here, and....

Silence falls on her end as well. There are so many things she wants to say. Millions, maybe. But she can't seem to figure out where to start.]

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*it is... Darn phone typos;;

No worries! I knew what you meant :)

;;

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<33!

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